the goldfinch

So I rescued a little goldfinch today. It was stuck between two tightly woven fences, trying to go through the tiny holes, but it was just too big. So I found a tear in the fence, stuck my hand in, pried its clamped little feet off the wire, tucked its legs and wings in, and pulled it out. I walked away thinking... hmm. I just saved a bird. And immediately returned to my original thoughts of what the heck I'm going to do about school. That's when God flicked me.

I am that bird. Stuck between two fences with no way out, except that big gaping hole that only God's hand can fit through to tuck my legs in, hold me tight, and pull me out. The fence my claws are clamped down in is the fence of false comforts. Just like the goldfinch, I'm hanging on tight to things that comfort me for now, but are just going to break my legs or neck in the long run. I'm don't want to let go because at least for now I'm standing on something, even if I'm trapped in by the very thing I stand on.

So there is this huge hand reaching down to me and a voice saying "just let go, bird". I still freak out and flap my wings, sticking my head through the holes, cutting off air, and ripping out feathers. As the one trying to rescue the freaking-out bird, I think "if you'd just calm down I'll show you this hole that you can't see because you are panicking and a maniac" ... which is exactly what God's saying. "just chill out. trust me. you'll be so completely satisfied and free if you just let me show you this hole. trust me."