the guppy.

Mark 6 - the story of Jesus feeding five thousand people. It's always been pretty close to just a story to me until this week. I heard it differently this week, yeah, it was certainly the presentation, but also the situation in my life I find myself in.

So Jesus has been teaching in some random, rural place for what sounds like all day long. I'm sure it was sunny and hot and the crowd sure didn't have LazyBoys to sit on. They probably were getting a little cranky since they hadn't eaten since morning - you know how that is. The disciples tried to convince Jesus to dismiss them to go eat.

Jesus said to the disciples "You feed them!". And the disciples basically said, "Are you mad? That's a crap load of food and money!"

So Jesus says, "What do you have?"
The disciples reply, "Not much. Two fish and five loaves of bread".
They gave their small amount of food to Jesus, He thanked the Lord for it, and multiplied it. He multiplied it enough to feed five thousand men.

This is a simple picture of what He asks of us. No, we don't have ability to feed all of the hungry people of the world, free all of the slaves, love on all the orphans, or even put up with someone annoying. But just that tiny bit of faith and willingness, that's what we do have. And if we give that to Him - watch out. He wants to multiply it and do crazy, wild, God-size (in other words, unfathomable to us) things! It just takes us being willing to give Him the little that we do have.

the goldfinch

So I rescued a little goldfinch today. It was stuck between two tightly woven fences, trying to go through the tiny holes, but it was just too big. So I found a tear in the fence, stuck my hand in, pried its clamped little feet off the wire, tucked its legs and wings in, and pulled it out. I walked away thinking... hmm. I just saved a bird. And immediately returned to my original thoughts of what the heck I'm going to do about school. That's when God flicked me.

I am that bird. Stuck between two fences with no way out, except that big gaping hole that only God's hand can fit through to tuck my legs in, hold me tight, and pull me out. The fence my claws are clamped down in is the fence of false comforts. Just like the goldfinch, I'm hanging on tight to things that comfort me for now, but are just going to break my legs or neck in the long run. I'm don't want to let go because at least for now I'm standing on something, even if I'm trapped in by the very thing I stand on.

So there is this huge hand reaching down to me and a voice saying "just let go, bird". I still freak out and flap my wings, sticking my head through the holes, cutting off air, and ripping out feathers. As the one trying to rescue the freaking-out bird, I think "if you'd just calm down I'll show you this hole that you can't see because you are panicking and a maniac" ... which is exactly what God's saying. "just chill out. trust me. you'll be so completely satisfied and free if you just let me show you this hole. trust me."

Utopia

Dad buzzing by on the lawnmower, grass clippings on the washed out driveway, three mismatch ducks roaming the barnyard, the smell of an overgrown lilac, freshly turned under manure, steak and morel mushrooms on the front porch for breakfast, and a bath in my garden tub to top off the day. I'm never going back to school.

The Intersection

The intersection: our personal intersection - we were created with this in the Lord's mind. The intersection of passion and purpose known and revealed only by God. The intersection is where we find incredible joy.

Today, I think the Lord exposed a little more of my intersection to me. It's like a puzzle - you see many pieces but can't imagine how they could fit together, let alone fit together to make an amazing photograph. Here are my pieces:

- I love Africa, Afghanistan, basically all of the 1040 Window (where the most people live who have no way of ever hearing about Jesus).

- I love plants and growing things, in particular I love tree fruit. It amazes me how a beautiful, wonderful smelling flower could turn into something that tastes as amazing as a sweet cherry. Come on, really. That has got to baffle everyone.

- I love coffee. I am proud to work for Starbucks (voted 7th best company in the nation to work for by Forbes - and rightfully so).

- I have a huge desire to spend a good portion of my life living and serving the Lord in any one of the numerous countries in the 1040 Window.

- The major coffee growing regions of the world land almost exclusively in the 1040 Window (with the exception of Latin America and Kona coffee from Hawaii).

- Turns out coffee is actually a tree fruit. It comes from what is known as a coffee cherry...hmmm... coincidence? No, it's just the way God rolls.

- Starbucks has three Farmer Support Centers. One in Costa Rica, Rwanda, and Ethiopia. Two of which happen to be... in the 1040 Window.

- Had a meeting today with Dave Olsen, creator of these Farmer Support Centers. Yes, an amazing man and one of the first partners at Starbucks. An unbelievable special opportunity to meet with and speak personally. He even gave me his e-mail address to talk more about opportunities overseas with Starbucks. Again...it's just the crazy way God is.

So these pieces are coming together for me slowly, and not necessarily working for Starbucks overseas, that was just an exciting part of my day today, but most importantly the first six pieces. That's my passion and I'm thinking it may also be my purpose.